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Apr 30, 2024

Paul, Regina Stankowski help ‘forgotten population’ find stability, hope post-foster care

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Career grinder Paul Stankowski relishing journey on PGA TOUR Champions

Career grinder Paul Stankowski relishing journey on PGA TOUR Champions

    Written by Doug Milne

    On Wednesday afternoon of the Invited Celebrity Classic a few weeks ago, Paul Stankowski striped ball after ball with both accuracy and precision on the Las Colinas Country Club driving range. Nothing was amiss or even out of the norm.

    Well, almost nothing.

    A popular question among his fellow PGA TOUR Champions players and caddies that afternoon was, simply: “What is Direction61:3?”

    When asked directly about the new front-and-center logo on his hat, Stankowski responded with a question of his own.

    “How much time do you have?”

    Enter Dr. Myron Wilson

    As one in the ministry with a past deeply defined by challenging mission trips spanning multiple decades, Wilson has been all over the world and seen a lot that, quite frankly, was hard to see.

    The indelible images which troubled Wilson most, though, weren’t anything he found serving in third-world countries. What weighed heaviest on Wilson’s heart was what he found right at home in the heart of Texas.

    “I was working in our church one day about 10 years ago when someone in the front office called and asked for my help,” Wilson recalled. "She said, ‘We have a young lady up here that needs to speak with a minister.' I came around the corner and, sure enough, there stood this young girl. I asked her how I could help, to which she said, ‘I don't have any food, money or even parents to claim me. I’m 18 and have no place to go. I have nothing.'"

    Following a serious heart-to-heart conversation with his wife, the Wilsons took the girl in to live with them until things got back on track. But, according to Wilson, residual from traumatic experiences in her past left her ill-prepared to hold down a job or even attend school.

    “One day, I heard a car door slam out front,” Wilson said. “She just up and left. I've haven’t heard from her since. I called and texted repeatedly, but I got ... nothing.”

    Wilson and his wife struggled trying to comprehend the girl’s abrupt and unexplained departure. After all, they had done everything they could to help her, but felt they had failed.

    “It actually became a catalyst of sorts,” Wilson said. “I came to discover that thousands of youths in our country turn 18 and immediately become homeless. They age out of foster care.”

    Every year in Texas alone, upwards of 600 young men and women hit their 18th birthday and age out. Nationwide, roughly 30,000 kids age out annually.

    “I felt like there needed to be some kind of safety net to catch these kids before they end up out on the street and part of, what we call – the ‘forgotten population,'" Wilson said.

    Enter Direction61:3

    The brainchild of Wilson’s assembled team, the organization drew its name from the Book of Isaiah, verse 61:3, in the Bible. To paraphrase, it speaks of rescuing those who are troubled, giving them joy in their heart – instead of mourning – and hope for a future in which they can be planted.

    Formed in 2016, Direction61:3 provides older foster and aged-out youth in the Dallas-Fort Worth area a network of support while they transition into independent young adults. The kids, ranging in age from 14-22, are fully supported by way of residential and non-residential programs.

    With the first home donated in 2017, Direction61:3 successfully opened its doors in 2018. Today, the organization operates six homes and remains hopeful for two more this summer in North Dallas. Total capacity of the current six is a combined 23 kids.

    Knowing he would need as much financial, physical and emotional backing as he could get to make Direction61:3 a success, Wilson and his team included fundraisers in their efforts.

    Enter Paul and Regina Stankowski

    At one of those fundraisers last year in Lewisville, Texas, Paul’s wife, Regina, not only attended, but enthusiastically offered to begin volunteering. Little time passed before Regina was asked to increase her involvement and join on as an ambassador. In that role, she actively helps raise awareness of Direction61:3.

    Eventually, Wilson asked to meet Regina’s husband, who he only knew to be the man behind her magic.

    “I didn't know Paul at all,” Wilson admitted. “I had no idea he was a professional golfer. At our first meeting, I actually asked what he did for a living.”

    A relationship developed and grew. One of Paul’s action items that has now come to fruition is Birdies for Foster Youth. The objective of the initiative is to have people pledge any dollar amount for every birdie (or better) he makes over the course of the remaining season on PGA TOUR Champions.

    “If I can help bring awareness to Direction61:3 that results in a difference here in DFW, I’m all in,” Stankowski said. “If we can even raise enough money to fund a home for a year, that would be great."

    Stankowski’s “big picture” hope is to raise at least $100,000.

    “This doesn't have to be just a DFW area thing, either,” Stankowski said. “This is just what we're doing right here, right now. But long-term goal, I'm wondering how we all can put a permanent plug in the dike.”

    No one involved is under any impression that this is a small dike. But, with the help of people like Paul and Regina Stankowski, consensus is that there can become a fitting plug for a large issue that a large part of society has no awareness of.

    Not only do many foster care kids have no family, but they've been bounced around from home to home within the foster care system.

    “I had one young man in our ministry who had been in 22 homes,” Wilson said. “Another young lady had been in 18 homes in her high school years … four years – 18 homes.”

    Often, foster kids have no stability on which they can rely, Wilson explains. As a result, when they turn 18, they find themselves on the street and very much at risk for homelessness and/or sex trafficking. Wilson points to some powerful statistics show that a majority of those incarcerated for sex crimes also have a history of having been in foster care.

    “What makes us unique is that we take youth at age 14,” Wilson said. “That way, we can get and work with them when they're young, before they age out. Once they've gained experience on the outside, or ‘street smarts,' you can try to bring them in and put them into a program, but it's hard for them to adjust to structure after that.”

    Because Direction61:3 takes individuals from 14-22 years old, not only do they get an early start in the program, but after aging out of foster care, they can remain in the program.

    Direction61:3’s current model involves three-year rentals of residential homes. Professional foster parents are in place to live in the home 24-7.

    With three to four youths in one home, the primary goal is to create as much of a normal living condition as possible which, in turn, affords them the confidence to feel just like the “more fortunate”kids not forced to exist in isolation.

    Wilson and Direction61:3 currently hold in its possession five acres of land just north of McKinney. In addition to the organization’s headquarters office, if a capital campaign goes well enough, the property will feature 18 cottages and total of 52 kids.

    Direction61:3 even features a car program, where donated vehicles work together with the kids working towards a savings account of at least $2,500. The cars are then sold to the kids for that $2,500. But, should the kid remain in certain programs for at least a year after that, the $2,500 is returned to the young adult.

    “We give the money back – with interest,” Wilson said. “It teaches them to save for a goal, teaches them discipline and, in turn, it teaches them how to realistically pursue a goal.”

    On one occasion, Wilson was alerted to the story of a young lady with a 3.6 GPA, poised to speak at her high school graduation. Wilson was told that the day after that graduation, the girl would turn 18.

    “I was told that if I didn’t take her, she would be celebrating the milestone birthday by being taken to a homeless shelter in downtown Dallas,” Wilson said. “She had already been accepted to nursing school. We took her in, and within two years, she had earned and saved enough money to get her car. She's now on the dean's list at Collin College in McKinney, with nearly $20,000 in her savings account.”

    Wilson’s contention is that if the individuals are positioned in such a way that they do not have to worry about where they’ll sleep at night and are surrounded by people to coach and guide them, the likelihood of success increases dramatically.

    “The way we see it is we're going to do everything we can to influence them while we have them,” he said. “It could be three weeks or three years. But, we’re there for them every step of the way.”

    Though countless stories include heart wrenching elements of struggle and strife, Wilson is sustained and even encouraged by the tales of success Direction61:3 is credited for. In one instance, after two years at Direction61:3 – the result of being abandoned on the street at age 16 – one young man went on to graduate from high school, work in management at Chick-fil-A, become a day trader, attend University of North Texas and teach a class in his church.

    All that just two years after being left to fend for his 16-year-old self on the streets.

    Almost all the kids discharged remain in contact with Wilson.

    “They'll text me, call me or even reach out on places like Facebook,” he said. “We've had kids leave and then reach back out to say things like, ‘Hey, I'm going to get baptized. Will you come watch?’ I try to attend those things and always come away with the confidence of knowing here's this kid that was with us in an effort to get his or her life back on track ... and, did it.”

    While the success stories do serve as encouragement into the mission working, Wilson isn’t one to lose any of his resilience.

    “Some kids come to us from a house with no running water, no electricity,” he said. “We've had kids that were sold in the sex trade by their own family. We’ve had kids that have been locked in closets. They have all types of abuse they've come out of. But, when you put them in a good environment, surround them with caring people, give them time and then watch God work, you’ll see what can take place in that life. It’s pretty rewarding.

    "I think people are shocked to know this is an issue. By raising awareness, when people hear about it, there's a positive response. People want to make a difference.”

    After the first meeting with Wilson, the Stankowskis attended a fundraiser, where Wilson’s powerful words and accompanying video resonated even more with Paul.

    “It just struck a chord in me,” he said. “It was something I never knew about. It wrecked me ... just the thought that this exists.”

    Stankowski refused to sit idly by and ignore the plight of a “forgotten population.”

    “I didn't have a hat sponsor, so I started wearing their hat,” he said. “I don't need to make any money. In a situation like this, I would so much rather go out and help raise some money.”

    And, he is doing just that. Three weeks ago, Stankowski launched “Birdies for Foster Youth,” where he is donating funds for every birdie (or better) he makes on a hole in PGA TOUR Champions competition. He’s inviting any and all others to pledge financial support to the campaign.

    Helping him do so is easy. Pledges can be made at any time and from anywhere ... including the comfort of home.

    For more information about Direction61:3, how to help or donate through Paul Stankowski’s "Birdies for Foster Youth" initiative, please visit direction613.org.

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